As the glitterati descended on Hollywood for the last awards bash of the season - the grande finale shall we say - the air was full of apprehension and excitement. How skinny would Guiliana manage to look this time (very - shock horror)? What sort of suit would Ryan wear  (Burberry with a side order of dust)? What shade of black would Angelina Mistress of Misery choose?

I simply couldn't wait to rush home from work last night and get settled in for an evening of Oscar red carpet glory, courtesy of my shiny new TiVo box.

To say I'm disappointed is an understatement. So disappointed in fact, I couldn't even bring myself to blog about it last night.

I was expecting BIG things from the ladies this year. I wanted glitz and glam, diamonds and to-die-for gowns. I wanted them to go one up on last year and show the world how it's done. I guess it's true when they say you can't always get what you want.

Only a few dresses impressed me this year, which is unusual. Usually I'm all over the shop, 'I want that, no wait I want that, no no no I want THAT, oh bugger it I want them all!' - this year? Not so much.

My favourite dress of the night was Natalie Portman's vintage Dior (circa 1950, this girl knows how to work it) - red with black polka dots. Clearly I'm warming to the colour red. Either that or she just makes it look so fabulous I can't help but love it. I don't really believe Natalie Portman can do much wrong in the style stakes to be honest, she's so dainty and pretty that she'd look awesome in a bin liner. Pretty as a picture and isn't she just thinspiration looking this good now when just a year ago she was waddling along the red carpet, heavily pregnant?

I'm also a big fan of Gwyneth Paltrow's Tom Ford white gown. Hell mend you if you go near her with a glass of merlot but here is living proof that you don't need to be Superman or Batman to look pretty awesome in a cape. How she managed to keep her cool all night though I'll never know - if that had been I would have zooming around, pulling it up over my face (Zorro style) and pretending I had the capabilities to fly.

Cameron Diaz in Gucci looks smokin' hot - in fact I think this is the best I've seen her look for a long time. Her hair colour and skin tone really suits the colour of this dress and her body looks amazing in it (bitch) - girlfriend done good.

Emma Stone in Giambattista Valli ROCKS. MY. WORLD. Yes, she's had a bit of a hard time of it for wearing this, and yes it is quite Nicole Kidman circa 2007 but who the hell cares? She looks amazing. It's BETTER than Nicole. And I'm not just saying that because I *heart* Emma Stone. I'm saying it because in my opinion it's true. She looks amazing and the colour is great on her. The only thing that makes me do my scrunched up face just a teeny wee bit is the big bow around the neck - but because she's not a busty girl, she pulls it off like a true fashionista.

I really like Rose Byrne's Vivienne Westwood number - sure it's quite safe and black is always your best bet for a formal event like the Oscars, but she looks so chic and elegant in this dress that it really doesn't matter if she's taken a risk or not. At the end of the day, I'd rather play in safe in something I know suits me, and look good, than take a risk in a dress I'm not 100% sure about and look like a fashion disaster who got dressed in the dark - or by a two year old (Sarah Michelle Gellar). My only problem? She's too thin. Get a cheeseburger down your neck love!

Oh look. She's wearing black. Atelier Versace. Again. And it's not even like I commend her for playing it safe and looking good like Rose Byrne, because, as usual, I think she looks horrific. She is NOT A STYLE ICON. She looks like she's about to suck the living soul out of every single person taking her photograph. And is there really any need to be standing like that? OK Morticia, we can see you've got a thigh-high split up your dress and you're oh-so-slutty (sorry, daring) and no one else has EVER done that before in the history of Versace gowns. You don't need to exaggerate the limb. We all know it's there.

And so, with an almighty sigh, and a wave of disappointment, I kiss goodbye to Awards Season 2012. I guess it's time to go back to my wedding folder and start concentrating on the more important things in life...

Roll on 2013 ;-) xoxo

SAG Awards 2012 - pass me my judgement stick...

Another weekend, another awards ceremony - I do love this time of year. I didn't quite have the stamina to stay up and watch E! (big up Ryan and Guiliana, although when are they going to ditch that pollution Kelly Osbourne?) last night for the red carpet so I had to rely on the newspapers this morning to get my fashion fix - and I wasn't disappointed.

As usual there was an influx of Marchesa gowns gracing the red carpet and here are my three favourites:

Sofia Vergara - I'm starting to fall a little bit in love with her. Mainly because she's got the huskiest voice ever. And probably because she's *so* pretty. And a lot because I like her dresses. She looks stunning in this gown that hugs her curves beautifully.

Viola Davis: Now I'm having a bit of a conundrum here because part of me loves this dress, part of me hates it. The reason being is that I think it doesn't suit The Help actress at all. The dress itself is stunning, it's a gorgeous cut, the colour is perfect again her skin - but it's not for her if you know what I mean? It looks too small, maybe that's the problem, she seems to be busting out a little across the chest - maybe if there was a bit more material up top it would look a hundred times better? I don't know, I'm just of the opinion that if you're THAT booby (and I speak as a busty gal myself here) that deep cut sweetheart neckline on a strapless dress is best avoided.

Stacey Keibler: My final Marchesa worshipper of the night and I think possibly my favourite of all three. It's sexy without being OTT and slutty (black lace isn't always the classiest option) but she's got this look down to a T - utterly chic and gorgeous. Maybe it's something to do with that incredible man-bag she's got hanging off, I just don't know...

Next up is she who can do no wrong: Emma Stone. In an Alexander McQueen prom dress and Tiffany jewellery. *Sigh* She is giving all the big wigs a run for their money in the style stakes - it's getting better and better every time I see Ms Stone and I cannot wait to see what she'll pull out of the bag for the Oscars next month.

After what I felt was a bit of an epic fail (granny's old grey lace curtains) at the Golden Globes, Glee star Lea Michele has attempted to redeem herself somewhat in this slinky silver Versace number. I'm not offended by it, but I think she's trying too hard to be hot and sultry. Last year she was all about the Barbie doll peaches and cream look, as if to scream how cute and sweet she was - this year (now that she's a "serious" movie actress and all) I get the impression she wants us to view her in a different light? If only Jessica Rabbit could see the trend she started.

Last year Michelle Williams made a major fashion faux pas in Valentino at the Golden Globes. This year she avoided making the same mistake twice and wore Jason Wu. However it seems Michelle was willing to give old Valentino a second chance last night and this time she got it spot on. This red gown is stunning (and we all know my feelings about red clothes) it really suits her colouring, her hair and make up look gorgeous - has playing Marilyn Monroe finally brought out Jen Lindley's inner glamour-puss? My only criticism? The dress could be a couple of inches longer.

This is certainly not my favourite look of the night but I think Rose Byrne deserves kudos and a pat on the back for bucking the trend: she banished the long elegant gowns to the back of her stylist's closet for the night and said hello to the jump suit. I sort of like it. She wears it well and she stands out in a sea of dresses. Good on her.

Morticia Addams - sorry, Angelia Jolie - is back to her not-so-fabulous 'best' in what I can only describe as a black bin liner. She has single handedly managed to make Jenny Packham, the designer of sensational wedding gowns, look cheap. She can literally suck the life out of anything. And if one person tells me they think she looks fab... well I'm sorry but you're a moron.

I've loved Emily Blunt ever since she stole the show from Anne Hathaway in The Devil Wears Prada. Now I love her even more. Her green Oscar de la Renta gown really stands out from the crowd and she just looks so beautiful in it. One person remarked that they thought it was "unflattering around her thighs" - that person is an idiot.

I don't actually know who the designer of this monstrosity is - but I also don't want to know. All I know is that Maria Menounos make a colossal fail with this... words fail me... cheap, tacky, wouldn't-look-out-of-place-in-Quiz get-up.

We all remember Audrey from Dawson's Creek right? No? The one who went out with Pacey (after Joey...and before her) No? She's Courtney Cox's sidekick in Cougar Town? Ring any bells? No? Ok well, she certainly won't be making headlines for being the number one fashionista in town either. Did she come from the beach or is she taking the whole irony of boho chic just one step too far?

I really love Dianna Agron in this gorgeous little Caroline Herrera number. Just like the designer herself, she's kept it simple, elegant and timeless. I am impressed. I'm also LOVING the hair.

Who requested the mail-order hooker bride?? Oh, it's Heather Morris from Glee. My mistake.

Amber Heard rocks this Zac Posen number - I love love love it. She even looks a tad like Scarlett Johansson here - or is that just me?

The Big Bang Theory's Kaley Cuoco in Romona Kevaza. Style - yes. Colour - no. Is it just me or does it look like she washed her green socks in with her wedding dress by accident?

Shailene Woodley in L'Wren Scott. I can't even think of anything nice to say here. This is truly horrible.

I really want to like this gown by Aussie designer Collete Dinnigan on Judy Greer - I REALLY do. But there's something holding me back from loving it completely and I can't quite put my finger on it - I think it's the slightly too high neckline, but I'm just not sure...

Until the Oscars lovers... over and out ;-) xx